High Maintenence

Wow. Has it really been two weeks since I've written anything? I'm sure that the two people that read this have stopped checking it at this point.

So I have given an official notice at work that December 2 will be my last day. This leaves me both excited and nervous, but before I explain why, I just want to point out how awkward giving notice to a boss is. First of all, all bosses at one point were not bosses. They, too, were mere employees who at some point had to give notice. So when you walk up to them and say, "Do you have a minute? Can we talk?", they know its coming. You've practiced the speech a thousand times in your head and come up with a retort for any possible topic that the conversation might procure. The most fun one to play out in your head is the one where your boss gets mad and you tell him off...but that one never seems to happen.

Then there's the conversation, which I have always equated to breaking up with someone. "It's not you, it's me. I've got some issues right now and it's better for everyone if I go. You've been great, really." Actually, I'd rather break up with someone than give notice. At least when you break up, you get to walk out the door and never see them again. At work, you still have to keep going until your notice is up. Imagine giving 3 weeks notice to your girlfriend. "Uh, so, yeah, three weeks from today will be my last day as your boyfriend."

And then there's the backlash. Once you tell all your co-workers that you're leaving, they never treat you the same. Not necessarily worse (though sometimes) but usually just different...distant almost. There are two major feelings that a cook can have when he/she hears that another cook is leaving. The first is jealousy. If they, too, are unhappy, they will be angry at you for beating them to the punch. The second is happiness, not because you're leaving per se, but because it opens up opportunity and moves the chains of the hierarchy. It's all very complicated, though I'm sure its not much different in all other lines of work.

So back to the excited/nervous part. Well, I'm excited because 1) I don't have to work there anymore 2) for the month of december I'll be doing some part time work that pays twice what I'm making right now 3) I don't have to negotiate time off for christmas (although tickets home are upwards of $600...yikes!) and 4) i get to spend some more time with megan.

The nervous part is that once the holidays are over, I have no idea what I'm going to do. This will be the first time in my adult life that I have left a job without another one lined up. It's not really someting I would consider if had a mortgage or kids, but since both of those mammoth responsibilites are just a few years away, I might as well enjoy the freedom while I can.